Ramblings.. VII?!
These past couple of days have been a nightmare.. I have been been drowning in paperwork and have resulted to hiding under my desk so people think I’m not around.. Fiddlesticks.. Now people will know where to find me!
I feel like I need a holiday to get over my holiday..
I want to take a walk.. Hand in hand with him.. Along the beach.. Watching.. Hearing the waves. The almost-midnight breeze gently moving across the width of my neck.. Down the small of my back.. I need a holiday!
Tomorrow is Friday and then it’s the weekend and then it’s Monday all over again.
I have been busy every weekend since I have been back..
I want to be back in Portugal.. I miss it.. The people.. Atmosphere.. Just being there.. It wasn’t like it wasn’t my life because it was.. And since then I’ve always felt like a huge chunk of me is gone and that frustrates me.
Today I worked 3 hours overtime.. When I left home this morning it was dark.. When I left work at the end of the day it was dark.. I was 45 minutes shy of working for 12 hours.. And that will not happen again.
I miss Portugal. I know why but I don’t understand it. Here I feel trapped.. Stressed.. Like I’m unable to just be myself. It was so much easier starting all over again and just being me..
There is so much I want to say.. But it’s not the time.. Not yet..
Apple, what are you waiting for? I think you know what you need to do. We leapt from London and down to the sea by the coast and then as you know across Europe to here. I think life is too short and valuable to waste it in a place that doesn’t work for you, your mind and spirit. I know it’s easier said than done, but you’ve already done it once. And these days with cheap flights and the Internet, family are still relatively nearby. In the mean time, don’t work too hard.
I have no idea what I am waiting for.
I am currently working in the North in a job that I’m not too keen on. In the interim I am working on something bigger.. but for now I tolerate this because I know I am not going to be in this forever. I’d love to do that whole living in another country experience all over again. I never thought that I’d miss it as much as I do though.. that’s the really worrying part.
I’ll try not to work too hard.. Although I cannot promise anything.. 🙂
You have my sympathies. I feel much the same as you.
I am actively ensuring this week – and all those going forward from this – are going to be amazing!
Keep forgetting that I need to remember God has something better.. Does that make sense? 🙂
Yes it does Apple, indeed it does 🙂